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--Prepare to lap it up. The annals of this partiulcar Steamroller website are chronicled here. History sucks.--
3:53 PM 09.20.2004 A.D.
Bump next yearish, try RIGHT NOW!!!! If you're wondering what that means, if your prayers have been answered, if the steamroller buttons are in, yes. Yes they are. Yes they are 50 cents. Yes they rule. And yes. There is no item limit. I mean no. There isn't. Get them while they're hottt.
9:03 PM 09.16.2004 A.D.
Dear god. Allie Stafford (our former biggest proponent in college) has rated our site at an 8. So in order to repair any lasting damage that may have been done to our markedly pristene record i hereby dedicate this new update and new TRUTH! to the Angelic Allie Stafford. Hopefully no bad blood remains betwixt us. OH yeah, buttons???? Who knows when. Perhaps before next yearish???
9:32 PM 08.30.2004 A.D.
In a startling turn of events Steamroller was ranked in the top ten unsigned funk bands on purevolume.com for a record breaking 3 days running. All credible evidence to the contrary, people seem to like us. i just thought you guys would like to be privy to this shocking revelation. Look for maybe a new truth, despite the fact that ive been saying that for the past week with no results, and some buttons REALLY REALLY soon! ish?!?
7:48 Pm 08.24.2004 A.D.
Woah. Stop the presses. As of the above posted date Steamroller is ranked #5 on the unsigned funk bands on the totally bitchin purevolume.com. How fucked up is that. Answer? Really Really Fucked UP! I'm not sure what the public was collectively smoking when they decided to listen two our two shitty songs 25 times between the hours of 12 midnight and 7:48 PM, but it should be smoked way more often, twice daily I'm thinking. And for all of you who threw up a little bit in your mouth when you heard Drop It, i can only apologize and assure you that the song does not really suck that badly. Anyways, keep rocking the fuck out, and thanks. Look for kick ass buttons in the order of next week and more updates when i get around to it. ish?
4:20 PM 08.24.2004 A.D.
Apparently there are at least 13 Steamroller fans, because that is the number of plays we have on purevolume right now, making us the 10th MOST PLAYED FUNK BAND FOR TODAY!! That means our picture on the chart. Its real sweet. Thanks. Too bad these recordings seriously suck, and I'm not just saying that. By the way, if you want The Truth to be a reality, better get on those suggestions. Gohead and drop em in the suggestion box. Steamroller pins REAL QUICK, and more updates soon. ish?
11:03 PM 08.17.2004 A.D.
The Truth (an editorial penned by our very own Simon) is now in circulation. Suggestions for weekly topics are welcomed and even required as a prerequisite for awesomeness. Look for more shitkicking updates and a new editorial in the weeks or days to come soon. ish?!?
1:32 AM 08.06.2004 A.D.
Remember how you couldn't look into the Suggestion Box without adding a post? Me too. At least now it's fixed and it's way cooler. Look for more sweet site enhancements soon. ish?
10:00 PM 08.04.2004 A.D.
Done. We swore we'd fix it. Steamroller comes through again. Kick Ass Places page is fully operational. Look for more updates, and hopefully a photo page, soon. ish?
9:45 PM 08.04.2004 A.D.
Check out the counter at the bottom of the page. Pretty sweet huh? Looks like a frikkin odometer. Brilliant. It's at about 30 now, but granted, at least half is prolly Ray. Look for more updates soon. ish?
2:57 AM 07.21.2004 A.D.
This webpage is done. Only thing is that absolutely nothing on the Kick Ass Places page works. Not a fucking thing. I dunno why. But I swear that it'll get fixed. Look for more updates soon. ish.
12:52 AM 07.21.2004 A.D.
There is now a section where whiny bitches can get their shit straightened out. Looks for more updates soon. ish.
12:43 AM 07.21.2004 A.D.
There is now a cute little picture of a steamroller, as in reference to our band name. Look for more updates soon. ish.
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